Assorted Afflatuses

For the past six years, I have advised people not to upgrade to HDTV. After all, most cable and satellite providers have, at most, about ten HD channels, most of which air regular "standard definition" content the vast majority of the time. And neither HD-DVD nor Blu-Ray can claim a decisive victory in the so-called "format wars," making HD movies difficult to come by. Indeed, if not for the HDTV now sitting in my living room, I would still advise people to wait. But after experiencing HDTV, I cannot continue making that recommendation.

The picture quality of HDTV continues to blow me away: I often feel as if I am gazing through a window — albeit one with a restricted depth of field — not into a television set. Watching the second two hours of the 24 season premiere on Monday night, I could see the sweat coating the characters' faces and the minute imperfections in the actors' skin. Whether the makeup department needs to augment each actor's allocation of foundation, I don't know: it certainly looks more realistic, though, it is far from flattering. Even the on-screen clock, shown to indicate when in the chronology the episode takes place, looks sharper, almost becoming a feast for the eyes.

And with the promise of much more HD content — from CNN, the Food Network, FX, Sci Fi and TBS, among others — coming later this year, HDTV is even more compelling, as far more content will become available.

Granted, the HD movie situation does not look any better than it did a month ago. LG's new combination HD-DVD+Blu-Ray player costs far too much and, according to the various gadget blogs, it lacks the software to play interactive HD-DVDs. Warner Brothers' solution, to offer discs that will play in both Blu-Ray and HD-DVD players, also offers no fix. While it may play in both players, consumers will still have to contend with the fact that some studios only release their films on one format or the other. Movie buffs who, for whatever reason, enjoyed Poseidon, for example, can only find that movie on Blu-Ray.

Nonetheless, now is the perfect time to upgrade to HDTV. The prices of small- and medium-sized displays have fallen significantly in the last 18 months, and, with new 8th generation manufacturing plants coming online, prices for larger sets will likely plummet in 2007, making price much less of an issue. HDTV has finally matured to the point where I can say, without a moment's hesitation: "Upgrade!"

Watching parts of the Macworld Keynote on Apple's website, I could not help but notice the somewhat incongruous nature of Cingular's CEO Stan Sigman's presence when he took the stage. Unlike Google's CEO Eric Schmidt, who jogged onto the stage, Mr. Sigman waddled quietly out of the corner like a middle-aged, overweight penguin. Mr. Sigman also made the choice to read his speech off of notecards, something the other three speakers — Jobs, Schmidt and Yahoo Co-Founder Jerry Yang — wisely avoided. Even Bill Gates, whose speeches I generally consider quite marginal, manages to present sans notes at trade shows.

But even using the penultimate speaking crutch, Stan Sigman seemed incapable of articulately communicating his message. He stumbled on small words, created popping noises in his lavalier microphone — a feat I thought impossible — and he even confused Cingular with its new corporate parents. Whoops. Almost any fifth grade elementary schooler could have delivered a better speech, albeit without the industry buzzwords. (Though, that might actually constitute an improvement).

If I were the one giving the presentation, I would have been in the corner, cringing as Sigman doddered across the stage, ruining my meticulously prepared presentation.

Next time Cingular, send the PR guy.

For the last two and a half years, I have refrained from upgrading my cell phone. I have no doubt that my cellphone needs a replacement, but, at least today, nothing on the market has the fairly unimpressive feature set that I want in a phone. It really comes down to six features:

1. A logical, simple, aesthetically-pleasing and stable user interface
2. Seamless syncing with my Mac, without gobs of extra software or encumbrance
3. A GSM/UMTS radio that operates both in Europe and the US
4. Easy data input, either via handwriting recognition or a Blackberry-style thumb keyboard
5. Basic PIM and email functionality
6. A reasonable price

Some models have come close, indeed very close, to meeting all six of my not-that-outrageous criteria. Palm's Treo 680 comes close, but Palm OS syncing on the Mac is quite painful and the Treo 680 lacks a 3G radio. Samsung's widely publicized BlackJack also scores well, but it uses Windows Mobile, which does not sync easily with the Macintosh and runs the notoriously unstable and obfuscated Windows Mobile OS. Sony Ericsson's P990i, available only in Europe, does everything, but it costs $1000 in the United States: far more than I would like to spend on a phone.

With all of the buzz surrounding Steve Job's keynote tomorrow morning at Macworld, I have adopted a hopefully attitude that, tomorrow, I will finally have the opportunity to upgrade my phone. But if Apple makes the phone too consumer centric, then I doubt it will have a GSM radio compatible with European networks or any easy way to input data. Nonetheless, it is Apple, so I have high hopes that, perhaps, they will release two or more models, if indeed they aim to make the phone consumer-centric, rather than catering to the Blackberry audience.

I cannot wait to see what Apple announces tomorrow morning at Macworld, be it this long-rumored Applephone or a menagerie of other fun gizmos. Though, a cell phone that satisfies my six criteria would really make my Tuesday.

The title of the new Harry Potter book, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, has prompted me to make the world "hallow" this week's word. Many people mistake hallows for hollows, which does not even have a similar root, much less the same meaning.

In truth, I never thought the war would begin. Certainly, Sony and Toshiba had developed rival, incompatible high-definition discs. Blu-Ray and HD-DVD, respectively. But consumer electronics manufacturers offset that threat by assuring the public they would produce hybrid devices capable of playing both formats.

Obviously, I was wrong. As quickly as consumer electronics manufacturers had promised to produce hybrid players, they withdrew their offers. Consumers, typically, bore the brunt of the moves. They could either wait — depriving their big new flat-screen televisions of content — or they could invest thousands of dollars in one technology and hope to live.

Then, early this morning, I thought I saw a ray of hope. LG, in the pre-CES announcement blitz, had finally unveiled their hybrid movie player, which could read both of the competing formats. Once again, however, I met only disappointment. According to engadget, the LG BH "Big Hoax" 100 will cost a mind-numbing $1200. Only imbeciles or people suffering from chordophobia would ever pay $1200 for a hybrid player, as you could buy separate Blu-Ray Disc and HD-DVD players for less than $1200.

LG will either fail to meet expectations or make the player more inexpensive, unless they have a marketing campaign imbibed with a quantity of cleverness never before seen. Otherwise, even the most facile consumer will notice the deficit of thought in LG's pricing.

After four years, Fox's simultaneous hit-miss teen drama, The OC will finally air its final episode at the end of season four on 22 February. I could not be more pleased. Everyone fawned over at least one aspect of the show, from the cleverly chosen music to the "quirky" characters, at least until the show's ratings tanked in the third season, which probably contributed to its sooner-than-expected death.

While I may dress — entirely coincidentally, I might add — like the "Seth" character, according to several The OC fanatics, I have only watched one episode. I had my TiVo record it almost exactly one year ago today. Watching it only confirmed my every belief that the show featured crazy, but attractive, people who found themselves in the unlikeliest of circumstances during their assorted escapades. In the one episode I watched, the plot made absolutely no sense and the characters behaved very strangely. One scene stands out very clearly in my mind: a woman enters her kitchen, carrying a bouquet of roses, and proceeds to jam them down her garbage disposal, sobbing. It seems more like something that Saturday Night Live would feature as a joke than something that might actually take place in someone's home.

Needless to say, I struggled to watch the entire episode, even with my lovely little "30-second skip" button. How people tolerate, much less enjoy, The OC every week continues to baffle me. Though it baffles me even more to read the comments on television blogs from avid The OC fans, mourning the loss of the show.

On the other hand, I bid The OC and fond farewell. May it rest in peace amongst other television shows rerunning on cable.

(The full, glorious press release from Fox, which details the demise of my not-favorite television show, follows the discontinuation.)

Unfortunately, my MovableType installation did not correctly publish this article on Monday morning, as it usually does. Anyway, the word is chimera.